I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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