I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Randomize
