she looked like the bat from fern gully.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
