But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
