i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
