I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
