I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
