mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
The air taste purple.
Randomize
