About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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