She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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