Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
