I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
