Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
