it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
