the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
