You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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