I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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