just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
How's work?
Spinning.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize