How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
