you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I think your dad took our porno
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
