I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize