I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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