i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
