There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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