He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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