Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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