I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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