cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
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