At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
