Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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