I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
