scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Watching her eat just hurts me
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
