you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize
