I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
