you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
