yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
