There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
