If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize