Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
