Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize