remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
