NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
