When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
