I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
