please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I love you. Go after that dick
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
