At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize