omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
