He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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