i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
