evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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