She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
